Comedy Central HD (United Kingdom): TV Schedule for Today

Marjorine: Cartman is convinced that the girls have a device which can see into the future. The boys come up with a plan to take it. Unfortunately for Butters he's a major part of the plan. (S9, E09)

Follow That Egg: In a bid to prevent Mr. Slave from marrying Big Gay Al, Mrs. Garrison forces the children to help him in an experiment to prove that gay marriages are unstable. (S9.

Ginger Kids: After giving a hate speech against 'the gingers', Cartman awakens the next day with a case of 'Gingervitus' and soon rallies against the persecution of his fellow red heads. (S9, E11)

Lee Evans gives us a side-splitting grand finale to his 100 date sell-out UK tour. More vintage material here as he re-enacts coming home a drunken mess from the pub and Brits on package holidays.

Ronny Chieng breaks down how JD Vance calling Chinese people "peasants" has escalated both the shade war and the trade war with China. Guest is Democratic Senator & veteran Tammy Duckworth.

The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy: Ross reveals a fantasy to Rachel involving a certain "Star Wars" character. Meanwhile, Monica suffers from insomnia after her breakup with Richard. (S3, E01)

The One Where No One's Ready: In a race against the clock, Ross tries to get the gang dressed and ready for a black-tie benefit at the museum. (S3, E02)

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Mr Bean and Teddy remember past experiences, like Bean's unfortunate trip to the dentist, his sleepy time in church, the Christmas turkey disaster, and even the demise of his beloved Mini.

Mr. Bean sits a maths exam and is confident until he realises he's studied the wrong equations. Then, Mr. Bean tries to discreetly change into his swimming trunks at the beach. (S1, E01)

Mr. Bean goes shopping at a department store. Afterwards, he goes to a fancy restaurant where he tries to dispose of his awful-tasting meal, and gets into mischief at a royal greeting. (S1, E02)

Mr. Bean tries to navigate through the various challenges of everyday life. This time, he takes a plunge at the swimming pool, has trouble in a car park and gets a fright at the cinema. (S1, E3)

Mr Bean unsuccessfully tries out his new technology. Later, Bean's night out spells disaster for a stage magician, and he shows off his dancing skills at Club Phut. (S1, E4)

Mr Bean, late for his dental appointment, tries to get dressed and clean his teeth on the way. After the dentist, Bean visits the park, where he tangles with a pesky fly and a toy boat. (S1, E05)

Mr. Bean hits the road! At a bus stop, Bean tries his best to revive a heart attack victim. Later, Bean packs for a holiday, and attempts to entertain a sick boy on a plane. (S1, E06)

Enjoy the Christmas adventures of Mr Bean! He visits town for a chaotic shopping trip, and tries to host a romantic Christmas for his girlfriend whilst preparing a disastrous festive feast. (S1, E07)

Mr. Bean causes trouble at a hotel and gets competitive with his hotel neighbour. After eating some spoiled oysters, he wakes up at night to some loud noises and gets locked out of his room. (S1, E08)

Mr. Bean hosts a unique New Year's Eve party, which soon drives the guests away. The next morning, Bean tries a spot of DIY and literally starts off the new year with a bang. (S1, E09)

While visiting the seaside, Bean accidentally becomes lumbered with a baby. So he does the honourable thing of treating it to a day at the fun fair. (S1, E10)

The One With The Blind Dates: Joey and Phoebe deviously arrange awful dates for both Rachel and Ross, hoping that an appreciation of their former relationship will cause them to reunite. (S9, E14)

The One With The Mugging: Joey develops an unusual acting method in order to impress a famous, pompous actor, Leonard (Jeff Goldblum), during an audition for an important stage role. (S9, E15)

The One With The Boob Job: Chandler and Monica each ask Joey for a loan behind each other's backs. When Chandler learns Monica asked Joey for money, Joey says she needed it for a boob job. (S9, E16)

The One With The Memorial Service: Ross and Chandler post false information about each other on their college alumni website, resulting in Chandler being posted as gay while Ross is dead. (S9, E17)

The One With The Lottery: The friends pool their money and buy dozens of lottery tickets. However, they bicker over how to spend the fortune if they win. (S9, E18)

The One With Rachel's Dream: After seeing Joey act out a romantic scene for Days Of Our Lives, Rachel starts to have feelings for him. (S9, E19)

The One With The Soap Opera Party: Ross gets a crush on another professor, Charlie, who has only ever dated "Nobel Prize" winners. Meanwhile, Chandler attends a disturbing one-woman play. (S9, E20)

The One With The Fertility Test: Chandler and Monica's nervous visit to a fertility clinic is made even more uncomfortable by the unexpected appearance of Chandler's ex...Janice! (S9, E21)

The One With The Donor: Disappointed to learn that they cannot conceive a baby naturally, Monica and Chandler 'interview' Chandler's co worker (John Stamos) as a potential sperm donor. (S9, E22)

The One In Barbados: The gang goes to Barbados for Ross's conference. Joey and Charlie break up when he realises they have nothing in common. (S9, E23)

The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss: Ross and Joey both try to confess to each other about their new relationships with Charlie and Rachel. However, only one of them comes clean... (S10, E01)

The One Where Ross is Fine: Rachel, Joey and Charlie attend a dinner party at Ross' apartment, but they fear for his state of mind when he overindulges in wine, song and laughter. (S10, E02)

The One With Ross's Tan: Ross goes to a tanning salon but fails to follow the "simple" instructions. Meanwhile, Rachel and Joey struggle to make the transition from friends to lovers. (S10, E03)

Michael presents the world's leading comedians, music stars, and jaw-dropping speciality acts as well as his own comic talents. Featuring Catherine Tate and Bill Bailey!

TV & film star Alyson Hannigan joins for a date at a restaurant where everyone is a famous cartoon character. Gary has a tough choice in "Dating App", featuring a series of evil Ryan's. (S13, E03)

Star guests Penn & Teller join the cast to put their improv skills to the test.

Kevin giving his take on the modern world, social media, anxiety, religion, waiting for fast food, and comparing Trump to a Glasgow taxi driver.